I often hear Mums say they are ‘busy’, which is quickly followed by a sigh or a quick calculation of the day and the tasks they need to do. I want to offer you some insight on how using the word busy can affect your emotions, cause you to overeat and ultimately sabotage your efforts to lose weight.
This is a 2 part blog, and next week I will offer you solutions to avoid the negative emotions that come hand and hand with the thoughts you may have around being busy. These same concepts will help you keep taking action toward your weight loss goal. Think of it like Busy 101 and Busy 201. You need to learn the foundation stage first.
When you think the thought ‘I am busy’, what feeling does this create for you? Google states the definition of busy as ‘Having a great deal to do’. Most of my clients who say they are busy, experience, stress, overwhelm, self-pity or dread. If you are an emotional eater, how do you like to escape from these emotions to feel better? My escape used to be a KitKat to get me through the afternoon, or a mini magnum or a glass of wine or three, while watching two episodes of some Netflix resulting in me ‘hitting the hay’ past my bedtime.
The phrase I am busy seems like such an innocent phrase. It is one that just slides off the tongue, and we use it like it is just describing our lives. Get conscious of it, because it very well may be causing you some unnecessary suffering and making you less productive.
How Busy Is Created
Busy is created in your mind. For some people, busy may be having 2 or 3 things scheduled in the day and for others, it may be having 6, 7, or 10. Busy is subjective to the individual, but the thing that the word busy has in common with people is that it creates unhelpful feelings that cause us to reach for that extra biscuit with your coffee, or afternoon muffin to make you feel better and escape those feelings of self-pity or overwhelm.
You may decide you are too busy to prepare yourself a meal, so instead will grab something quick and easy. This often looks like something in a packet that is high in flour or sugar, not the foods that you had promised yourself you would start eating to help you lose weight.
If you go deep, you may even be able to identify the physical feeling that is created from your thoughts around being busy. I spot it now and again. It is a fast feeling in my body, and my mind ruminates on the things I need to get done, causing my body to feel a bit panicky.
But the great news is when I spot it, I know that it is created by my thoughts, that it is not useful and I know what I need to do to get back on top of my game.
Actions created From Thoughts of Being Busy
Let’s start with why thoughts around being busy are not useful or helpful. Your thoughts around being busy, create you to feel negative emotions like stress and dread. These emotions will determine how you act. I offer you that great actions do not come from these feelings. Have a look down the list below and see if any of the actions sound familiar to you when you are feeling dread, overwhelm, self-pity or stress when in busy mode.
Do You…
- Often rush or not finish the job because you already started the next one.
- Go into a room to do something and forget what it was you were going to do.
- Show up a little bit snappy with your family.
- Constantly think of the list in your head and are not mindful or attentive to what is going on around you. For me, this looked like not listening to what people were telling me or not watching what was going on around me.
- Make an extra cup of coffee or tea in a day, or grab something sweet to keep you going.
- Have a wee scroll on social media to escape for a moment and end up wasting 20 minutes and then beat yourself up for wasting time.
- Binge watch a bit of Netflix in the evenings or have a glass of something to take the edge off. Or maybe a sweet treat to feel better.
- Find yourself going to bed later because you have watched that extra episode on Netflix wishing you listened to the sensible you and gone to bed earlier.
- Find it hard to sleep because of the late chocolate that has made you a bit wired, or had a less restful sleep because of the extra drink you decided to have while watching the second episode and feel a bit foggy.
- Give yourself a hard time for not going to bed earlier because you have so much to do tomorrow and experience a little bit more of that dread and self-pity at having to get through another busy day.
Why use of the word Busy is not serving you
Can you see how thinking thoughts about being busy can create something for you which is not helping you get the results you want? And when I say results you want, I mean the results to get jobs done and to continue looking after yourself by taking actions towards you and your health. Whether that be a weight loss goal, planning time for your personal growth or creating time for wellness practices.
Things like less sleep, less productivity, change of mood with your loved ones, inattentiveness, overdrinking, and overeating are not great signs of looking after yourself.
Your challenge to remove the word busy
I have officially moved into my house over the last 2 days at the time of writing this article. We emptied an awesome amount of boxes, and have made our house a home again. Before being a life coach, I would have said it was a busy time with work, managing children’s schedules, meals, and unpacking. But intentionally not using the word busy has maintained calmness and clarity which sees me as my most productive. I finished tasks that I started, was systematic in my approach (not scatty), and a lot less snappy than previous moves.
The great news is that when the hot cross bun smell wafted from the oven (that I had made for the moving team), I did not feel the need to grab and go. I spent an extra 5 minutes looking after myself and made a super basic but yummy salad. Great fuel to keep me unpacking those boxes into the night!
Busy is just a word, yet we have this belief that if we are busy we cannot be happy. We make it mean something about our lives by the way we choose to think about it. Over the next 2 weeks, I want to challenge you to describe your day or week differently. What could you say instead of busy?
I know that during my move I used a few different tools, but most of them I will share next week. The one I want to share with you now is that instead of being busy, I described my 2 days as dynamic. This word and thought provide me with the energy and motivation to get the job done.
Now you are familiar with the importance of questioning your belief and thoughts around being busy, just notice yourself using the word and see what it brings up for you. In two weeks I look forward to sharing Being Busy 201 and the tips to help you manage your to-do list. The same to-do list that may have previously seen you reaching for the extra biscuit or glass of wine.
Have a beautiful week.
