So, you may have used food and/or alcohol as a coping mechanism, so what? You have done what many people in our current society do. But you are ready to lose weight and feel better and the way that you are using food to cope will not get you to these results. In this article, I will give you some tips on how to stop coping with food when losing weight.
Food and alcohol are coping mechanisms. They help us cope by dulling or numbing our emotions. They make us feel better in the short term, but rubbish in the long term. They make us feel worse as we add a sprinkling of …. I am so disappointed I let myself get to this point, on top of other feelings that made us overeat or overdrink in the first place.
Stop beating yourself up
Buffering away your emotions with food and alcohol is not good or bad. It just stops us from getting to our goals. Chances are that you have used food or alcohol to numb out feelings, as a reward or to feel better. That is not good or bad, you are just ready to do it a different way. And you can.
When you class using food or alcohol to cope as bad, the way you feel about yourself is, you guessed it… bad. Therefore, I encourage you, not to see using food to cope as bad. This does not mean you condone downing a whole bag of chocolate cookies or a bottle of wine. What it does mean is that if you make a mistake, you take the layer of self-judgement away. You avoid going into the cycle of feeling worse and reaching for the sugary fix to escape the chatterbox in your head. The chatterbox that tells you that you failed again, you are not capable, or you don’t deserve to feel better.
Instead, you put your big girl (or boy), pants on and take the next action to get to your goal of weighing less, following through on yourself and fitting into some of your favourite clothes again.
You are not a failure, you are learning. Like a baby learning to walk, there will be times you fall and eat more than you meant to. Don’t make it mean you have failed, but you are learning. Keep going. A baby simply decides that they can do it. They haven’t gathered all the layers of self-judgement and negative beliefs about their ability. They keep going until they get the job done. The only way you fail is if you quit. How many 5-year-olds do you see still crawling because they gave up on the walking thing?
5 tips on How to Stop Coping with Food
- If you make a mistake don’t beat yourself up – you are learning a different approach to managing emotions and it takes time. Beating yourself feels worse and you will most likely not take loving actions (like eating well), from this place.
- Be honest with yourself – why are you overeating or over drinking? What emotion are you trying to avoid? What is causing this for you? THIS IS WHAT YOU WANT TO DEAL WITH. Give up the food or drink and you will pretty quickly figure out what you are trying to escape from. Is it stress, loneliness, boredom, overwhelm, unfulfillment?
- Get some help with what is really going on in your life. Write down your thoughts so you can see what is going on in your head, talk to a friend or find a professional that can help you. It is not weak to ask for help. It is brave and shows strength. It is a step in the right direction to take care of yourself.
- Be open to experiencing emotion – we think it will be intolerable but the cost of not feeling your emotion leads to more of what you have now. Using food to cope. And you don’t want that result.
- Develop the mindset I am open to believing I can do this. You will make mistakes and that doesn’t mean failure. It means you have a human brain, and you are learning. Think consistency over perfection. Be kind to yourself. You deserve to feel better and great in your own skin.
Some of you reading this article will be disappointed that I have not given you the practical actions to stop coping with food. You want me to tell you to meditate more to relieve stress, connect with others, get 7-9 hours of sleep or schedule 30-minute walks into your day. These are all great actions, but unless you deal with the root cause of the negative emotions the actions may be short-lived.
I want you to know that whatever comes up in your life you will be able to manage your emotions around it, and not dive into the freezer for the ice cream or the fridge for the wine at the first sign of discomfort. Alcohol and food are always available to you, but if you want the long-term solution to release weight then consider the 5 tips on how to stop coping with food.
If you want some help to unravel the causes of your overeating and learn strategies to put the brakes on your emotional eating or drinking, then get in touch. I have the ‘Power Hour’ session. A one-off session to help you explore your overeating and start you with an action plan to shed those pounds. Being brave is uncomfortable, but so is being in a skin that you are not happy with.
Click HERE to schedule a free no-obligation discovery call to let me know your challenges, or drop me an email at rebecca@rebeccagoodacre.com
Have a beautiful day
